Hi, I’m Jessica and I help adoptive moms become better equipped for the demands of parenting children with a history of trauma.
Right now, I bet what you need is to take a few deep breaths, relax your shoulders and quiet your mind because I know what you've been dealing with all day.
It’s 10pm on Friday night and your kids are finally asleep. You collapse on the sofa with your head still spinning and your heart still racing. You just endured two hours of your son screaming, punching and spitting on you during a rage. You had simply asked your son to put away the toys he had been playing with. After he denied the mess was his and refused to pick up the toys, you asked him to take a break in his room. This is when his behavior started to escalate.
You promised your daughter you would bake cookies with her tonight but that never happened. She’s been hiding out in her room all this time. You can’t believe this chaos is your life. You thought parenting was supposed to involve fun family outings and warm feelings of connection toward your child but tonight you're just feeling numb. You feel completely drained and “cared out.”
You’ve probably tried some traditional parenting methods:
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Reward charts
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Time-outs
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Love and Logic
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Loss of privileges
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Parenting to your child’s chronological age level
These approaches likely made things worse because they didn’t take into account the effects that trauma has had on your child’s brain development.
Maybe you’ve even tried some trauma informed parenting approaches and interventions that have felt like they solved a piece of the puzzle:
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Time-ins
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Attachment building strategies
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Counseling
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Medications
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Occupational therapy
So why are you still feeling so alone, so burnt out, so disconnected to your child, and at a loss as to how to manage their behavior?
Here's what I've found to be true based on my on own parenting journey:
It’s not until you make some major shifts in yourself that you can become the secure base for your child. Only after you embrace your own healing, deepen your understanding of trauma and get serious about self-care, will you have the capacity to offer deep tools of healing.
I know what it’s like to live each day in survival mode, just waiting for the next shoe to drop. You feel emotionally drained by your child’s behaviors, physically exhausted and completely alone, because who could possibly understand the crazy dynamics inside your home? I know what it’s like to wake up each morning and feel like your day is another marathon to run.
The catalyst for my own personal parenting makeover was a health crisis that revealed my body was stuck in a state of stress.
As I began to prioritize self-care and experience healing in my own nervous system, I was able to face family challenges from a more grounded and compassionate place. I have personally experienced how much more manageable life is with these 3 principles which I help my clients with:
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The foundation of a strong support system
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The parenting approach of a lifelong learner
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The shift in focus from behaviors to connection
As a certified health coach I can provide tools to explore dietary and lifestyle shifts that enable moms to build greater stress resilience. My background in Recreational Therapy can assist moms in incorporating meaningful games and activities into family life to create stronger bonds of connection.
My 11 year journey of parenting three adopted children has driven me to understand all I can about trauma, brain science and attachment theory. I’ve spent years devouring any book or podcast on these subjects. I’ve also invested countless hours in counseling which has given me a deeper understanding of the unique dynamics at play in adoptive families.
My holistic approach starts with helping moms with emotional regulation, making self-care a priority, setting up support systems, and learning to break unhealthy parenting patterns. I then help moms help their children by introducing methods to build deeper connections, as well as exploring trauma informed parenting strategies.
My family still has its challenges, but I don’t feel so blindsided by them anymore. I have realistic expectations for my children and myself. I have a healthy perspective on what is outside of my control and what areas I have influence on. I have had success implementing trauma informed parenting approaches when done in conjunction with my own stress management routines. I enjoy a close relationship with my teen children and am a more stable, centered mom.
Fun Facts About Me
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I've always had a love for music and the ability to recall lyrics from numerous old pop songs—you might catch me belting out Journey's Don't Stop Believin' while driving down the road. Unfortunately, my memory doesn't serve me quite as well when it comes to remembering everything I need to buy at the grocery store.
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As a toddler, I spent an unforgettable summer living in a VW bus with my family while my dad hand-built the log cabin my siblings and I would grow up in. We spent our days making mud pies, exploring the woods, and even crossing paths with a few curious bears!
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I call the Pacific Northwest home, where I happily embrace all things outdoors. When we go camping, we steer clear of structured campgrounds — we either canoe or hike into the mountains, dig luxury ‘natural toilets,’ and attempt to hang our food high enough in a tree to keep it out of the reach of bears. It’s all part of the adventure!"
Client Testimonial
I am the mother of foster, adoptive and biological children. Jessica helped me set more reasonable expectations for myself. She is well connected within the trauma informed perspective and uses a lot of research-based materials.
Meaghan
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Client Testimonial
The biggest change I’ve noticed since working with Jessica is adjusting my schedule especially as a single mom, to prioritize individual time with my children and scheduling in true self-care which helps me find my strength to keep going on this awesome journey of motherhood. I'm also able to compartmentalize my children’s poor decision making.
No book prepares you for this journey. Moms need to know there are individuals like Jessica that get it and can assist you in reclaiming compassion, love and peace which our homes so desperately need. I would absolutely recommend Jessica’s program to other moms. She will help you refocus on the things that matter.
Katrina